Would you describe your life as successful? Take some time to consider why. According to the Oxford Dictionary success is defined as the following:
1. The accomplishment of an aim or purpose
2. The attainment of fame, wealth, or social status
Unfortunately there are many people that will use the latter definition to determine how successful their lives are. When people use external factors such as fame, wealth or social status they have no control over how satisfied they are with their success and ultimately their lives. As the recent economic downturn has shown many of us, our jobs, homes, cars and other status symbols are never a secure reality. They can be taken away when we least expect it. So if we base our level of success and happiness on having these status symbols, we leave ourselves open to feeling like a failure in life. This can lead to severe depression and seep into other areas of our life like our health and relationships with other people.
Another thing to consider is something called negative success. This may sound impossible at first but think about it for a second. Have you ever met someone who had a great career but other areas of their live were not so wonderful. Think of the successful businessman that works so many hours a week that his marriage is breaking down, his kids are strangers and his health is beginning to suffer. He may have success in his career and lots of material possessions but deep down he is not happy due to the problems in the other areas of his life. That is what I mean by negative success.
If you begin to use the first definition when evaluating whether your life is successful one thing becomes obvious - you need to figure out your life purpose or aim? Many people will never actually try to figure this out and so it is no surprise that they may never feel successful.
Here is a list of suggestions I have come up with to help people live a successful and happy life.
1. Put a lot of thought into how you define success.
2. Set SMART goals for yourself write them down and continue to monitor them until you have achieved them.
3. Every night before you go to bed pick three things that happened during the day that you are thankful for
4. Distinguish what you need, want and wish for in life and work on achieving or maintaining these things.
5. Be aware of your values and make sure you align your lifestyle, relationships and career with them.
6. Find your calling in life, whatever that may be.
7. Commit yourself to becoming a life long learner
8. Don’t base your future on your past
9. Seek first to understand, Then to be understood. - Stephen Covey
10. Never spend more time on things that don’t matter than on the things that do.
11. Don’t let fear hold you back from achieving your dreams.
12. Begin to look for a positive aspect in every negative situation you are faced with - you will be surprised!
13. People are driven by two things pain and pleasure. Don’t live life being beaten with a stick - go for the carrot instead! By this I mean don’t be motivated to do things in order to avoid pain, do things in order to gain pleasure. (Tony Robbins)
14. Focus more on your strengths than your weaknesses.
15. Make work/life balance a major priority in your life.
16. Write a mission statement for your life and try to stick to it! Make sure you adapt it fit your values as you continue to grow.
17. Be Mindful as often as possible. By being present in the moment so you can truly relax and recharge your batteries! Try yoga or owning a pet to increase your mindfulness. Even when you concentrate on your own breathing for a few minutes you give your body a break.
18. Be careful of the self limiting beliefs you may have developed over your life - many of them are totally ridiculous and can hold you back from achieving greatness.
19. Learn from your mistakes don't dwell on them.
20. Remember that while we get older we may become less physically beautiful but we have the opportunity to become so much better looking on the inside.
21. If you want something then visualize it and the universe will send it to you.
22. Make sure you view money as a positive not a negative factor in your life. Never say “I cant afford it”, say “How can I afford it?” (Robert Kiyosaki)
23. Don’t let your level of success be determined by other people.
24.Write down a list of all of your good qualities and keep adding to it as you go through life.
25. Go to a life coach so you can receive the awareness, direction, confidence and inspiration you will need to achieve success. In the same way that you would seek professional advice for other things in your life (Doctor, Accountant, Lawyer, Mechanic etc...) you should also give the same level of commitment to making sure your life is a success with a coach.